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EVERYTHING SHOULD BE UNDER
THE SUN
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German
in Turkey "I have been appointed foreign
correspondent in Turkey", my husband told me, "how do you
feel about that?" My immediate response was enthusiastic. I had
never been in Turkey before. I imagined it as exotic, colorful and exciting
but still familiar enough so I would not feel completely alien. My friends and relatives did
not share my enthusiasm. They pitied me. "Isn't it dangerous? Isn't
it a very chaotic, even dirty place? Wouldn't you be completely isolated?"
Leaving Berlin for Istanbul looked like a setback to them. Frankly:
Most Germans don't like Turks very much. They look down on them. They
avoid them. When a German girl marries a Turk it is regarded a serious
downfall. Of course not few have fallen anyway. The majority of foreigners in
Germany are Turks. Most Turks in Germany, many of them being Kurds in
fact, came from small Anatolian villages. A great number of them are
not sophisticated and worldly but cling to traditions in an environment
that is everything but friendly. The Ottoman army had threatened Western
Europe for centuries. Most Christians think of Moslems as merciless
fighters for their faith. In the plane to Istanbul I felt that ancient
fear of the Turk coming to the surface. I tried to laugh at the picture
of the mysterious dark and cruel Turk welling up from my subconscious. A tall blond blue eyed driver
picked me up from the airport. His English with a heavy Turkish accent
was not bad at all. I did not speak a word of Turkish. How many times
did I have to repeat the simplest phrase before I could keep it in mind
"Tesekkur ederim" (thank you) I thought I would never make
it! To show my gratitude to my patient Turkish teacher, I gave her a
present. To my amazement she did not open it until I asked her to. "It
is not the custom to open a present right away", she explained,
"but I will do it for you. "O my Goodness!" she cried
when she realized that I had given her expensive soap. She looked embarrassed.
"To spare you future misunderstandings I should tell you that you
are not supposed to give soap since the receiver might think she doesn't
smell good," she said, laughing at my complete bewilderment. We had to buy stuff for our house
in Tarabya. Being accustomed to a cool, industrial style we could not
decide on buying those wildly patterned bed sheets or these elaborately
decorated shiny brass lamps. The shop owners invited us to tea and we
chatted and looked around until finally we would make up our minds and
go for a less colorful but still wildly patterned bed sheet. Istanbul is a paradise for shopping.
But being at least one head taller than the majority of Turkish ladies
I hardly could find clothes or shoes my size. I like walking in nature. Planning
to take a walk in the forest, I parked my car at the side of a street
a little ways outside of Istanbul. Immediately another car stopped.
"Is anything wrong with your car, madam?" I was asked. I was not used to so much caring.
There were always people around me, people who would help me, people
who would advise me, people who were watching me. I was hardly ever
alone and nobody would understand why I wanted to be alone. Even in the street, people look
closely at each other, perhaps especially at foreigners. "I must
look really strange to them or really beautiful", I thought. Sometimes
I looked back. I found out that a man would then feel encouraged to
talk with me. I soon learned that it was enough to turn the eyes skywards,
raise the chin and make a short sharp sound with the tongue to turn
him down. In Western Europe it is considered
polite to look into someone's eyes while talking. But in Turkey a man
reads love in the eyes of a woman who looks into his. After a year or
so I understood the secret of a female look: It is something like seeing
without looking. In the streets of Tarabya I saw
many ladies with traditional long skirts and head scarves. I had imagined
that at least covered ladies would be shy and submissive. In fact I
have never met a submissive Turkish woman. They all seem to be remarkably
self-confident. The scarf would not weigh them down at all, even make
them stronger. Of course nobody hated the scarf more than my sophisticated
Turkish friends, those slim and beautiful ladies with elegant costumes,
expensive perfumes and always perfectly styled hair and manicured fingernails. One day I walked down the street
in my neighborhood, a car drove by, when suddenly something small and
hard flew out of the car's window and landed right in front of my feet.
It was an old battery. In the country I came from, you would not even
have thrown such a thing into the normal garbage can. When Ocalan had been captured
my German and American friends canceled their flights to Turkey. Without
success I tried to tell them that the possibility to be hit by a terrorist's
bomb was just as great as a flowerpot falling on their heads. I loved to live in Turkey. I
was amazed how friendly, charming and helpful everybody was. I had a
great time. I got so used to everything, that I forgot how different
the world I came from really is. After a few years I felt awkward
when I came home to Berlin for a visit. The first thing I noticed was
how unhappy and aggressive everybody seemed to be. Already at the airport
I noticed a high level of tension and it was even more apparent later
in the car driving through the city. In general Turkish people are
much less cynical, impatient and indifferent than my countrymen. For
a majority of Germans work is at the center of life. Turks work to live,
but Germans live to work. In Turkey people have always time for a tea
or two. They have time to help and time to chat. In Turkey people are
generous and would invite you whenever they get a chance, not so in
Germany. Salesmen in shops and waiters in restaurants would only assist
you reluctantly. Forget about a free cup of tea. Turks like to communicate. Everybody
has a cellular phone and uses it excessively. As an artist I was interviewed
regularly, reflecting the Turkish appetite for news. The mega-city Istanbul
was constantly buzzing and there was talk going on like in a small town:
who was with whom and all that. Germans are comparatively uptight
and in some parts of Germany you have to keep greeting people for weeks
before they would wave back. But once you have won over a German he
or she will be true to you forever. Turks aim to please, sometimes
to the point of excess. Some do things 'a la turka' but you can forgive
them because they are so nice and when you think about it, you did not
lose more than you got. I had a wonderful and unforgettable
time in one the most beautiful cities in the world. Having lived there
and having come to know wonderful people, I would say with typical Turkish
zest; "I am happy to call myself a Turk at heart." |
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This issue is dedicated to contemporary
Turkish artist
Erol AKYAVAS.
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@The Light
Millennium magazine was created and designed
by Bircan ÜNVER. Fifth issue. Winter 2001, New York. URL: http://www.lightmillennium.org |